So I wish I could start a new organization or something, maybe call it Imperfect Men. Or maybe I should just support an existing organization, or something simpler than an organization. My problem is this. I am a silent person, I do not say much, so people think I do not have visions or goals. And so my dreams and vision are wasted. And I will never achieve to share the wisdom I have had through my years, or the gifts or the calling.
Every time I join the church, it is the same thing. People worship either the church or the ministry, and I end up confused, why is there so little freedom in the church ? Why do we not give time for people to develop ? Why do we not take frequent vacations in our weekly ministries. Because I see it, people get burned out. And no, in 2012, we should have learned more, and no – it is not allowed anymore to run a ministry or church where you allow people to be burned out. So, where is the freedom in the church ?
So, I which I was f.ex. part of a outside prayer group. No, I do not mean, standing on streets with picket signs, like they did in the 70s. No, I mean – an escape from the spiritual mistake that we men like to sit around in chairs talking about feelings and spirituality. And towards the striving reality that tears us all between rest and unrest. Bookworms meeting outside in rain and snow every thursday year around, praying and trying to catch or fry some kind of fish. Just like the Jesus friends. They spent alot of time outside, I can recall.
But I will probably not achieve this. Not in this church. But maybe in society ? It is like my new saying: “If God can use Nina Hagen, he can use me”.